This Day: Lovely

Today, is the day! the Lord has made;
Sacred, precious — Sunday!
A Word spoken, conceived; she: Lovely!

Cherished forthwith, aye! always,
E’en before clock-time was born;
Creator’s lips sung, now adorn.

A day - this life - O, beloved!
Celebrated, revered birth — noble.
Dust, given breath by Him, made hopeful.

Carefully still, He counts each precious day,
Time itself, springing up like grass;
Similar, each strand of hair, at last.

Once, e’en still, treasured by the King, only.
Now, Together, I with Him
Hold dearly — indeed, presently kin.

At last! bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh.
O, Lord! this gift…for me? “Yes!”

O, beloved!
My beautiful, tender flower:
If only! I might speak – proper.

You: my Joy — in part, deferred.
Patience says “Wait, gladly!”
Determined, held by Grace, I stay: happy.

Space, set apart, by faith;
Tiny mustard seeds, sown.
Aye! soon, beloved, we’ll be Home.

Rejoice! O, my soul!
Today, especially! joyously I portray.
What! a lovely day!

My! How delighted!
How grateful, thankful: me.
To behold such wonder: she!

True Beauty, now perceived.
His double witness, see?
Love – here – revealed, what mystery!

Seven: sacred, holy; conjoined
United as fourteen: A name, complete.
Two, as one, full — now meet!

O, Lord! You are good.
Delighted, may I say?
Please, bless this gift: Lovely.

The Wood Pile

Ah! The crunch of freshly fallen snow
Beneath my boots; crisp, virgin, pure.
Sweet and lovely, just like her.

Warm breath exhaled, given by Him;
transposed, condensed, made manifest.
A cloud! created, blessed.

The wood pile, cheerful, ready, able;
Cut, stacked, ordered, born.
Now intentionally gathered, to warm.

Pointed sticks, made fuel,
Press into these arms of flesh.
Gladly, I, am reminded, of sweet death;

A living sacrifice, made for love,
The heart melted, anew.
Life, at last, made true.

Now, be at peace, O my soul!
Weeping, in joy, I see –
Nothing is lost in Thee.

So, ponder, consider, please, O beloved!
This, every moment, Together –
Our Savior King, our Treasure.

The Servant In Battle

I will rejoice and be glad in Your steadfast love, because You have seen my affliction; You have known the distress of my soul, and You have not delivered me into the hand of the enemy: You have set my feet in a broad place.

-Psalm 31:7-8

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Hear my cry, O God, listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth, I call to You when my heart is faint. Lead me to the rock that is higher than I, for You have been my refuge, a strong tower against the enemy.
-Psalm 61:1-3
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And He who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” Also He said, “Write this down for these words are trustworthy and true.” And He said to me, “It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment. The one who conquers will have this heritage, and I will be his God, and he will be my son.”

-Revelation 21:5-7


O Lord,

I bless Thee that the issue of the battle between Thyself and Satan has never been uncertain, and will end in victory. 

Calvary broke the dragon’s head and I contend with a vanquished foe, who with all his subtlety and strength has already been overcome.

When I feel the serpent at my heel, may I remember Him whose heel was bruised, but who, when bruised, broke the devil’s head.

My soul, with inward joy, extols the Mighty Conqueror!

Heal me of any wounds received in the great conflict; if I have gathered defilement, if my faith has suffered damage, if my hope is less than bright, if my love is not fervent, if some creature-comfort occupies my heart, if my soul sinks under the pressure of the fight.

O Thou, whose every promise is balm, every touch life, draw near to Thy weary warrior; refresh me, that I may rise again to wage the strife, and never tire until the enemy is trodden down.

Give me such fellowship with Thee that I may defy Satan, unbelief, the flesh, the world, with delight that comes not from a creature, and which a creature cannot mar.

Give me a draught of the eternal fountain that lieth in Thy immutable, everlasting love and decree. Then shall my hand never weaken, my feet never stumble, my sword never rest, my shield never rust, my helmet never shatter, my breastplate never fall, as my strength rests in the power of Thy might.

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No fear, O my soul! The King already reigns victorious! The Great War has already been won!

Then why are we warriors still down here in the trenches, I wonder?

Perhaps because, even though the King knows that the enemy has been overtaken and every foe conquered, the enemy is still giving a last pitiful effort to inflict pain and damage, as he is being overcome by all that is Good? Like a serpent with his head cut off, he wriggles around - soon to be lifeless - but still moving, and though his venomous bite has been taken from him and he can do us no real harm, he’s still in our midst, imparting lies and trying desperately to take even a few more good soldiers down with him before the King rides onto the scene.

That means the battles will soon cease, yes, beloved? This is but the the very end of the fighting! It will Soon be over! And we will return Home, victorious! To a life of feasting and beauty and rest, Together! All praise be to Christ!

So we will press on today, yes? Knowing that we are nearing the end of the struggle and the beginning of Real Life Together? What comfort! What consolation, O my soul!

Please be at peace, my beloved.

Come, Follow Me

Come, follow me. - He says.

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There, there…hey now. (gentle)

My! Look at this mess! (looks around with a sympathetic smile)

This is no place for you, beloved. No, this won’t do, not for much longer. I know you see beauty here, and I’m so glad! It is beautiful, aye. But, don’t get too comfortable here, please. This isn’t your Home, beloved.

This…all of this, is good. Although I know it’s nearly impossible for you to see right now, you must trust me.

Here, take my hand, please. I’ll guide you, okay?

I know you’re weak, but I am strong. I know you’re thirsty, but I can satisfy you with living water - pure, cool, refreshing water. Water like you’ve never had before, beloved! I know your heart is faint; sick with love. I will ravish you with love - I already am, although it’s hard to see, and feel, I know.

You aren’t losing your greatest treasure, beloved. That’s impossible. I’ve purchased you with my own blood, and I will never leave you or forsake you. You have all things in me, even what you hold dear now.

I will do whatever it takes to win your affection. I have been pursuing you since before you took your first breath. And I will continue to pursue you when you breathe your last.

You will be fully satisfied, beloved. I know it’s hard to wait…but, do you know? I, even I, am waiting for you. I plead with our Father continually, to come to you. You ache, yes? Do you know something, beloved? That ache, is the very ache of my Spirit within you. It’s not your ache, beloved. It’s mine.

Be patient.

I am good.

Why Time? I cannot tell you, beloved. It wouldn’t make any sense to you. It would be harmful, actually. So, for your good, you must simply trust me. I do everything I do, out of love for you.

You don’t need to conceal your tears, your grief, beloved. They are beautiful to me. It shows me you long to be in my presence, fully. It tells me you aren’t fully satisfied now, which makes me happy…so very happy.

I marvel, and take joy, and pleasure in you - ALWAYS. Even when you consider yourself as worthless. I see you with eyes of Love.

I sing you to sleep every single night, beloved. Some Day you will hear me and see me as I am. O! how I long for that Day! You will rejoice over me, and I in you, beloved, FOREVER!

I am the very one that causes your mind to drift off into thoughtlessness. Do you know? I cause your heart rate to slow, and carefully count your hairs every night to be sure I haven’t missed any. You lost several of them yesterday, I still know the whereabouts of each one, and I have my angels guarding them for me.

Nothing in heaven or earth takes place without my allowing it. Nothing. Every single wave, every wisp of wind, every insect, every atom, every molecule…everything beloved is motionless, dead without me giving it life. I give you life.

Follow me, beloved. I will…open my hand; I will satisfy the desire of every living thing - including you.

I love you.

A Nighttime Prayer

O Lord, my Beloved,

I fear I can’t write or speak elegantly just now. All I know is raw emotion. 

I feel like I am losing my greatest treasure, somehow, like what I hold dear is slipping through my fingers and there’s no way I can possibly grasp it. 

How much will You require? How hot of a furnace can I withstand, as You purify and refine me? How many waves must sweep over me during my time in this shadowy land? How many deserts will you require me to traverse? I wouldn’t choose the fire on my own. Or the waters. Or the wilderness. I don’t want any of it. Or...at least...I don’t think I do. 

I want balmy beaches and sun-soaked mountains and vivid prairie sunsets. I want a few wispy clouds and perhaps a gentle rain shower now and then, but only when absolutely necessary. I want a cozy cabin for two; to be Together every moment, to grow things and explore places and soothe one another; I want to sing and pray over my beloved, to make delicious foods and drinks that will satisfy. I want to chop and stack wood, and sit by the fire, bodies intertwined, reading aloud in the quiet, smiling gently with knowing eyes. I want to give myself, all that I have and am and ever will be. I want to know and be fully known. I want perfect Love, Together. And I want it all now.

How childish! How foolish, O my soul! 

I can feel myself bucking against You and I hate that. I don’t want to be at odds with You. I know you are Good, truly. I just...what, beloved? I just...don’t want to wait. It always comes back to that, doesn’t it, Father? Always comes back to my inner battle with Time? I hate Time. I know I shouldn’t. But I do. 

Why Time, Lord? I know, I know...consider the young maple tree, beloved. You’re right. You’re always right. She needs maturing, doesn’t she? She’s not all she might One Day be yet, clearly. For she is weak and helpless and of little use as of yet. One Day, she might grow to be more, so much more, I pray.

I’m sorry for my aching heart, Lord, sorry for my tears of self-pity. I should be submitting to You, willingly, gladly, and instead, I am pouting, again. O, when will I ever learn? I grow weary of myself, beloved. How can you not also grow weary of me?

Why do I feel like all is lost? Or will soon be? I battle fear all the time, beloved. Fear of losing that which my heart treasures so, my cherished one. I couldn’t bear it, do you know? Surely He will not ask such a thing? Surely not? Not that fire. Not those waters. Not that wilderness. Not my beloved. I beg You.

I’m sorry, Lord. For all of this. For all of me that fights and bucks against You. If it’s any consolation, I hate it too, as You must, yes? I’m sorry for my tears when I should be rejoicing. I’m sorry for my endless asking when I should be content with what You have given already. I’m sorry for my fear and lack of trust in You, when You have promised that You are a Wise King, a Good Shepherd. Please forgive me? Please

I feel like I should end with some great revelation or with a word of forced praise or something, but the truth is, I’m still weeping and I still don’t want to submit and do it all Your way. I want to want that, but I don’t; not yet. 

How stubborn and mule-headed you are, O child! You flail about and kick and scream at all hours of the night, like now, when you should be sleeping! When will you learn to rest? To trust? To allow yourself to be carried and gently tended to? Is that really so hard? To have Someone else do all the work, while you hunker down in arms of Love? No, beloved. That’s not hard. I want that, actually. To be cared for in that way. To rest. To be at peace. I do want that. And that is what You’re offering, isn’t it, Beloved? Yes. I see that now. I remember. I will settle down and go to sleep now. I will be at peace. I trust You. I love You, Father. 

Will You please sing over me tonight? Words of love and reassurance? Would you run Your hands though my hair and whisper in my ear and stare down at me in awe, with the most beautiful tenderness? I would like that. I would like that very much.

A Wise Desire

He shall choose our inheritance for us.

– Psalm 47:4 (KJV)

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The Christian is always pleased and delighted when he can see Christ in the Scriptures. If he can but detect the footstep of his lord, and discover that the sacred writers are making some reference to him, however indistinct or dark he will rejoice: for all the Scriptures are nothing except as we find Christ in them. St. Austin says, "The Scriptures are the swaddling bands of the man-child—Christ Jesus, and were all intended to be hallowed garments in which to wrap him "So they are; and it is our pleasant duty to lift the veil, or remove the garment of Jesus and so behold him in his person, in his nature, or his offices. Now, this text is concerning Jesus Christ—he it is who is to "choose our inheritance for us," he in whom dwelleth all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge is the great Being who is selected as the head of predestination—to choose our lot and our portion, and fix our destiny. Verily, beloved brethren, you and I can rejoice in this great fact, that our Saviour chooses for us.

It is a great truth that God does choose the inheritance for his people. It is a very high honor conferred upon God's servants, that it is said of them, "He shall choose their inheritance." As for the worldling, God gives him anything, but for the Christian, God selects the best portion, and chooses his inheritance for him. Says a good divine, "It is one of the greatest glories of the Church of Christ, that our mighty Maker, and our Friend, always chooses our inheritance for us." He gives the worldling husks; but he stops to find out the sweet fruits for his people. He gathers out the fruits from among the leaves, that his people might have the best food, and enjoy the richest pleasures. Oh! it is the satisfaction of God's people to believe in this exalting truth that he chooses their inheritance for them.

I do not know whether all of you can go with me here, but I think you must in some instance or other be forced to see that God has indeed ordained your inheritance for you. If you cannot, I can I can see a thousand chances, as men would call them, all working together like wheels in a great piece of machinery, to fix me just where I am, and I can look back to a hundred places where, if one of those little wheels had run awry—if one of those little atoms in the great whirlpool of my existence had started aside—I might have been anywhere but here, occupying a very different position. If you cannot say this, I know I can with emphasis, and can trace God's hand back to the period of my birth through every step I have taken; I can feel that indeed God has allotted my inheritance for me.

It was a true faith that made the Psalmist say he relied upon God. He knew him to be worthy of his trust, so he said, "Thou shalt choose my inheritance for me." And, again, it was true love, for love can trust—affection can put confidence in the one it loves; and since David loved his God, he took the unwritten roll of his life, and he said, "Write what thou wilt, my Lord." "Thou shalt choose my inheritance for me."

– ‘A Wise Desire’ - The New Park Street Pulpit Vol. 1 pg. 253-260 (C.H. Spurgeon)


O, beloved!

I know what you’re thinking; what you’re feeling. I know well, oh so very well! the struggle…the toil of this journey.

It’s a battle of our will, yes? It’s a constant clashing, and surrendering, and trusting in His divine purposes instead of the desires of our flesh. Do you concur?

But, oh! will it ever stop? Will the striving cease?!

It will, beloved. In the fullness of Time, it will. It will run its course. Eventually, the bridle will be removed. We’ll be set free - at last!

But, like everything else in His creation, this cannot be rushed. This conflict must serve its purpose.

We don’t understand. How can we? (said gently) Surely, we think, we can choose our inheritance, yes? Maybe…we…can….go…”this”….way? (sigh) No, beloved. (said even more gently) Not that way.

But, what can we do?

We can trust that what He chooses for us is best. We can put our trust in Him, in His goodness. Moreover, we can trust in His love for us. For the only way to trust, is by love, yes?

Yes.

Let’s show Him our love, Together in this: let’s let Him choose our inheritance, for us, beloved.

He knows what’s best. And, He is good, so very good.


O Lord,

Please help us. We have such limited vision. And our reasoning, our rationale…is pathetic, at best. When we look around and try to make judgments and decisions…when we survey the feelings of our heart…we’re left dazed and confused.

Please, tenderly, cup our face with your strong but gentle hands, and turn our gaze away from ourselves and direct our eyes back to You.

Through the eyes of faith, given to us by the grace of your Spirit, help us to see your everlasting, steadfast, faithful love for us. Melt away all doubts and fears, all thoughts of our choosing. And may we only, always, desire what You choose for us over everything else.

We love You, O King!

We bow before you…knowing that even the crumbs from your table are more satisfying than any other temporal snacking. Enlarge our appetite to the max, for You, Lord…and come quickly, Beloved! For we are parched of thirst…desperarte for You to satisfy.

We want You to choose our inheritance, Lord. We know You love us. We know it’s what’s best.

Come quickly, Lord Jesus!

Amen.

He Hath Dealt Wondrously With Us

And praise the name of the Lord your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you.
-Joel 2:26 (KJV)

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Beloved, we shall, in the better land, wonder more than we do here, for we shall there understand far more than we do now, and shall have clearer views and wider prospects. Our present capacities are narrow, there is scant room within our mind for great things; but in yon bright world the veil shall be taken off, and we shall know even as we are known, seeing no more in part and through a glass darkly: in the heavenly mansions our growing knowledge will excite in us increasing wonder, and we shall sing there the praise of Him who hath dealt wondrously with us.

I believe the poet was right when he said - ‘And song with wonder and surprise; Thy lovingkindness in the skies.’

In the abodes of endless bliss we shall see what we escaped; we shall look down from Abraham’s bosom and see the sinner afar off in torment! It will be a dreadful sight, but O, with what hearts of gratitude shall we bless redeeming love, knowing each one of us that were it not for grace divine that fate so desperate had been ours. 

In the heaven of perfect holiness, we shall know the true character of sin. When we shall see the brightness of God’s glory, and the splendor of His holiness, sin will appear in all its hideousness, and we shall adore that matchless mercy which pardoned us, and bless the precious blood that cleansed us though we had been defiled with such pollution...

Up in heaven, too, we shall see our life as a whole, and we shall see God’s dealings with us on earth as a whole. A great many matters which now appear mysterious and complex, concerning which we can only walk by faith, for our reason is baffled, will be so clear to us as to excite our joyous songs in heaven. ‘Now I see why I was laid aside when I wanted to be busy in God’s work: now I see why that dear child, whom I hoped to have spared to me as a stay for my old age, was taken away; now I understand why my business was suffered to fail; now I comprehend why that foul mouth was allowed to be opened against me; now I comprehend why I was assailed with inward fears, and was suffered to go tremblingly all of my days.’ Such will be our confessions when the Day dawns and the shadows flee away.

Then we shall say and sing: ‘He hath dealt wondrously with us.’ We shall feel that the best was done for us that even Eternal Wisdom could devise, and we shall bless the name of the Lord.

- ‘Wonders’ - The Metropolitan Tabernacle Pulpit Vol. 19 pg. 119 (C.H. Spurgeon)


O, beloved! Can you imagine with me for a moment, please? What it will be like when we cross over into the better land? 

The scales will fall from our eyes! The veil will be lifted! The lamp, full to the brim with the oil of gladness, will be lit! And O, what Beauty we will see there, sweet one! What knowledge we shall gain! It will all make sense Then and There, beloved - it will! 

Now, we see through a pin hole; Then, we will see through a sweeping, panoramic lens! Now, our brain capacity is the size of a mustard seed; Then, we will be able to take in information and truth in stride, effortlessly, limitlessly - all our senses heightened and magnified and glorified! Now, our hearts grow faint and they wander - O how they wander, beloved; Then, they will be most joyfully bound to our Beloved King and will never stray from Him again! O what grace there will be, in such a sinless, perfect kingdom, beloved! We anticipate His coming with such great longing, do we not?

There, we will see clearly how sin disguised itself and nearly did us in. We will come to know just how close we were to the precipice, the cavern of death, that once threatened to swallow us whole, and the gratitude we have for Christ, our Deliverer, will only grow more and more sincere. We will come to worship Him with greater humility and delight, with a magnified sense of awe and wonder, as we understand what it is that He actually saved us from - the very pit of hell.

We will sing Together There, beloved! We will sing of His wondrous works, of how He weaved these lives, these identical hearts, this story, into the most beautiful fabric - a glorious covering for us - to mask our nakedness and shame, to clothe us in His righteousness. We will sing of how He tenderly gathered every tear that fell from these tired eyes in our brief sojourn upon the earth and turned each one into a good gift for us There, a fruitful harvest of delight and abundant blessing for His beloved children. 

O beloved! My imagination fails me, as do my words, but O sweet one, do you know that as happy as we could ever imagine ourselves to be - on that Day, when we see the face of our Beloved, we will be infinitely happier than all we now hope and long for! 

The better land is in view even now, beloved. Do you see it, there in the distance? ‘Tis not a far journey, not really. ‘Twill it be hard? Aye, beloved. But we do not traverse alone. We have One who supplies the bread and water for our adventure, quenching our thirst and filling our bellies with pleasant foods; the same One also supplies shelter when we are weary, and warmth when we are cold, and medicine when we are sick. He listens when our hearts ache. He gently prods us on when we stubbornly tell Him we don’t want to take even one more step. He tenderly guides us and points us in the right direction when we wander blindly from the path. And He gives us one another - fellow, same-hearted travelers, to share in the burden, to walk side by side, to swap ponderings and encouragement along the way.

All of this is worth it, isn’t it, beloved? To know that we will One Day arrive at the better land, Together? It’s worth every ache and pain, worth every desire denied, every bit of self subdued? Aye, beloved. We give it all up, willingly, gladly, out of love for our Good God. He will not disappoint. For He has dealt wondrously with us, now and always. We trust Him Together. 

Thou Art My Portion

The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in Him.

– Lamentations 3:24 (KJV)

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My heart is resting, O my God, –
I will give thanks and sing;
My heart is at the secret source
Of every precious thing.
Now the frail vessel Thou hast made
No hand but Thine shall fill –
For the waters of the Earth has failed,
And I am thirsty still.

I thirst for springs of heavenly life,
And here all day they rise –
I seek the treasure of Thy love,
And close at hand it lies.
And a new song is in my mouth
To long loved music set –
Glory to Thee for all the grace
I have not tasted yet.

Glory to Thee for strength withheld,
For want and weakness known –
And the fear that sends me to Thy breast
For what is most my own.
I have a heritage of joy
That yet I must not see;
But the hand that bled to make it mine
Is keeping it for me.

There is a certainty of love
That sets my heart at rest –
A calm assurance for to-day
That to be poor is best –
A prayer reposing on His truth
Who hath made all things mine,
That draws my captive will to Him,
And makes it one with Thine.

I will give thanks for suffering now,
For want and toil and loss –
For the death that sin makes hard and slow,
Upon my Saviour’s cross –
Thanks for the little spring of love
That gives me strength to say,
If they will leave me part in Him,
Let all things pass away.

Sometimes I long for promised bliss,
But it will not come too late –
And the songs of patient spirits rise
From the place wherein I wait;
While in the faith that makes no haste
My soul has time to see
A kneeling host of Thy redeemed,
In fellowship with me.

There is a multitude around
Responsive to my prayer;
I hear the voice of my desire
Resounding everywhere.
But the earnest of eternal joy,
In every prayer I trace;
I see the glory of the Lord
On every chastened face.

How oft, in still communion known,
Those spirits have been sent
To share the travail of my soul,
Or show me what it meant!
And I long to do some work of love
No spoiling hand could touch,
For the poor and suffering of Thy flock
Who comfort me so much.

But the yearning thought is mingled now
With the thankful song I sing;
For Thy people know the secret source
Of every precious thing.
The heart that ministers for Thee
In Thy own work will rest;
And the subject spirit of a child
Can serve Thy children best.

Mine be the reverent, listening love,
That waits all day on Thee,
With the service of a watchful heart
Which no one else can see –
The faith that, in a hidden way
No other eye may know,
Finds all its daily work prepared,
And loves to have it so.

My heart is resting, O my God,
My heart is in Thy care –
I hear the voice of joy and health
Resounding everywhere.
”Thou art my portion,” saith my soul,
Ten thousand voices say,
And the music of their glad Amen,
Will never die away.

– Anna Laetitia Waring (1823 - 1910)

Pleasant Words, Indeed!

Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.

– Proverbs 16:24 (KJV)

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O, Father!

Thank you! My heart bursts! My soul within, bubbles over in gratitude! You are exceedingly great, Lord!

Wow! Your ways…they astound me! Your tenderness, your gentleness towards me…it…takes my breath away.

Forgive me please, Lord, for doubting your ways. Please, have mercy on me for lamenting, for licking my wounds, for wallowing in my sorrow - in self-pity. I’m sorry.

(pondering)

I can’t even remember any of it anymore, Father. All I see now is your goodness, your faithfulness, your steadfast love!

Your Words, Lord, they are SO very precious to me. And now…this…!?

My! What…a gift!

You are always full of surprises! (delighted)

Thank you.

O, Lord, THANK YOU.

I love You.

You do give good gifts to those who ask!

Once more, thank you, Father!

Lord, I give you praise, and honor, and glory! You are good.

Amen.

Paved With Love

The midst thereof being paved with love, for the daughters of Jerusalem.

-Song of Solomon 3:10 (KJV)

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Now, beloved, indulge yourselves with a glance around you for a minute. Look back to old eternity; let your eye peer through the mists which hide that ancient age before the ages began! What see you there but love, ‘according to His eternal purpose which He purposed in Christ Jesus or ever the earth was?’ Look a little closer; see the garden of Eden and the fall - what strikes your eye there, but love? The seed of the woman shall bruise the serpent’s head. Look to the cross, and at God incarnate here below; behold Jesus living in suffering, and dying in shame! Here love comes to her climax, and lays bare all her matchless charms.

Look to the time of your own life. Was not love present at your birth, perfuming your first breath? Were you not nursed in love, cradled in love, and swaddled in love? Have you not since then, even in your sinfulness, been loved with an exceeding great and wondrous love? Did not love turn your heart of stone into flesh? Has not love dwelt in you since then even to this day? Have not even your trials been sent in love? Blind unbelief called it severity; look now, as Jesus sits at your side, and say, was it not the wisest form of love that smote you, and made you cry out in bitterness? Oh, I do remember at this day nothing in the dealings of God to me but love.

I sat me down last night, as this text charmed my spirit, and tried to think over my whole life, if perhaps I might light upon some unkindness of God to me; but my solemn witness is that from the first day my life began to beat, from the first hour I knew anything of the Lord whatever, all His dealings have been love, love, love, love, love, love alone - nothing else but love. Of my life I can and must say, ‘the midst therof has been paved with love.’

- “Paved With Love” - The Metropolitan Tabernacle Pulpit Vol. 19 pg. 549 (C.H. Spurgeon)


O, beloved!

I know how, at times, you feel unloved.

I know your deep longing for intimacy, how you desire to be both entirely known and entirely accepted, just as you are, with your beautiful quirks and your sin-stained nature. I know that you want to be fully embraced, tenderly cared for, words of love and reassurance whispered huskily in your ear as you let down your every defense and truly rest, in peace.

I know it isn’t all just as you’d like it now, beloved. I know the battle. The immense patience that He requires.

But beloved? Do you see? Do you see what He has done? What He is doing still?

He loved you before the world even began, do you know? He loved you with a lavish love, a ravishing love, with the only kind of love that He knew would do, beloved! It’s woven into the Story, your story, from the very beginning.

Consider what He has done for you, beloved, please? How He has been so very tender and kind to you? He has drawn you to Himself from an early age, has led you through the wilderness of sin and given you the coolest drink of water to quench your parched lips. He has made every stone in your path to rise up and give you strength rather than to cause you to stumble. He found you, beloved, when you were lost. He has delighted to feed you upon His Word, to give you comfort when you have sought Him in fervent prayer. He has revealed His glory to you in the awe-inspiring intricacies of creation. He has given you hope, beloved, in the uncompromising truth that our King will come again and rescue us, and remake All Things! He has bestowed grace upon grace, out of the overflowing fountain that is His love, has He not?

He feeds us by His Word. He sustains us by His Spirit. He spurs us on by His Body. There is none like Him, beloved. No creature - not even the most lovely - can be for you what our Beloved Savior can be, what He is already.

He is already victorious! He is already reigning in love! Whyever would we fear, beloved? Whyever would we doubt? Whyever would we allow ourselves to be driven to despair? (gentle)

Can we not look back over all He has already done from the Garden until now, and see His most precious love for us? Can we not rest fully in our Christ who has carried us thus far and who promises He will never leave or forsake us?

He has paved our lives with love, beloved. What more could we possibly ask? (weeping happily)

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O Lord, You give us more than we could even think to ask or imagine, don’t You? You are the Giver of all good gifts. We promise to wait for You, to trust in You, to delight in the love which You have so generously given already, by Your grace.

Like obedient children, we will choose to submit to You, even when we don’t understand a lick of what’s going on. You are the Father; we are not. We are but dim-witted sheep which, admittedly, need much tending and minding, or we are liable to fall off a cliff or succumb to a stealthly wolf. We are so weak, but You are Strength itself. Thank you for being our Good Shepherd.

May we never forget Your love, Lord. May we see it in every tree and cloud; hear it in every hymn and bird song; smell it in every fire burning, every lilac blooming; taste it at Your table, in the broken bread and the poured out wine; feel it when our hands find one another and we hold on for dear life.

You have paved our lives in love, Christ. We bless You and praise Your name Together, forever!

When You Are "Alone"

When He was alone…the twelve asked Him about the parable.

– Mark 4:10

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When God gets us alone through suffering, heartbreak, temptation, disappointment, sickness, or by thwarted desires, a broken friendship, or a new friendship – when He gets us absolutely alone, and we are totally speechless, unable to ask even one question, then He begins to teach us. Notice Jesus Christ’s training of the Twelve. It was the disciples, not the crowd outside, who were confused. His disciples constantly asked Him questions, and He constantly explained things to them, but they didn’t understand until after they received the Holy Spirit (see John 14:26).

As you journey with God, the only thing He intends to be clear is the way He deals with your soul. The sorrows and difficulties in the lives of others will be absolutely confusing to you. We think we understand another person’s struggle until God reveals the same shortcomings in our lives. There are vast areas of stubbornness and ignorance the Holy Spirit has to reveal in each of us, but it can only be done when Jesus gets us alone. Are we alone with Him now? Or are we more concerned with our own ideas, friendships, and cares for our bodies? Jesus cannot teach us anything until we quiet all our intellectual questions and get alone with HIm.

– My Utmost For His Highest - January 13th (Oswald Chambers))


Beloved?

Sometimes, it’s good to be alone. See?

Again, you may feel alone, but you’re not really, not actually, not verily.

Rather, you’re alone with Him, your Beloved. See?

It isn’t so much aloneness, per se, it’s…Togetherness. It’s being united Together in peace and harmony in Love, without any distractions, without any interruptions, without anything vying for our attention. Yes?

Yes.

So, please, beloved. (said so very gently)

Please don’t fear to be “alone”. Don’t resist it, don’t fight it, don’t run away from it.

It’s Him, trying desperately, to single you out. He wants intimacy with you. He wants you all for Himself. He wants to be alone with you.

He will not stop until He has it. He will zealously pursue you and obliterate anything blocking His pathway towards you.

Nothing can separate you from His love, beloved:

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38,39

Do you see, beloved?

It’s okay to be “alone”.

You’re never alone.

He pursues you, now, and always, beloved.

Watching Unto God in the Night Season

Sleep at last has fled these eyes,
Nor do I regret his flight;
More alert my spirits rise,
And my heart is free and light.

Nature silent all around,
Not a single witness near;
God as soon as sought is found,
And the flame of love burns clear.

Interruption, all the day long,
Checks the current of my joys;
Creatures press me with a throng,
And perplex me with their noise.

Undisturbed I muse all night
On the first Eternal Fair;
Nothing there obstructs delight,
Love renovated there.

Life, with its perpetual stir,
Proves a foe to Love and me;
Fresh entanglements occur, –
Comes the night, and sets me free.

Never more, sweet sleep, suspend
My enjoyments, always new:
Leave me to possess my friend;
Other eyes and hearts subdue.

Hush the world, that I may wake
To the taste of pure delights;
Oh the pleasures I partake, –
God the partner of my nights!

David, for the selfsame cause,
Night preferred to busy day:
Hearts whom heavenly beauty draws
Wish the glaring the sun away.

Sleep, self-lovers, is for you; –
Souls, that love celestial know,
Fairer scenes by night can view
Than the sun can ever show.

– William Cowper

When You Feel Alone

Do you feel alone, beloved?

You’re not.

O, my soul, be careful; lend not your well-being to your feelings.

Feel what you may, but don’t stay.

Remember, beloved:

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. - Isaiah 41:10

You are never alone.

You have not been forgotten.

You are still loved and cherished.

Beloved? You’re not alone.

I Am Sick With Love

I am sick with love.

– Song of Solomon 5:8


Beloved? (said ever so gently)

Are you sick with love?

Aye. I thought so.

Oh! But, ‘tis a good thing!

Come now, listen, O fainting heart.

Consider with me, something Together, please.

Love, here and now, it…is deferred. Not entirely, but in many ways, it is, verily so.

I’m guessing (said tenderly), I don’t need to hash out, drag out, or parade all of the ways in which love is inhibited now. No.

If you’re like me, and you are - I know, you have no difficulty recounting such things.

However, I’d like to bring something to your attention, if I may. Please?

O, child! Do you remember pleading with your mother for a snack right before dinner time? Do you remember what she said? She said: “Beloved child of mine, you must wait, otherwise your appetite will be spoiled!”

Aye, yes. Now we recall, do we not?

She was right, of course. You were hungry. Aye, perhaps, even famished! - or so it seemed, at the time. You would have been satisfied, I reckon, with even a little teeny tiny bite of something…or would you have? That’s what you told yourself, anyway.

But, when dinner-time came, when the fullness of time - according to your wise mother - had finally dawned; when all the preparations had been accomplished; when the best of food, for your nourishment and well-being, had been procured; it was Time to eat.

Together, we know, what it’s like to have a spoiled appetite. (sigh) We may have the choicest of food before us, our favorite delicacies, the best of the best, and yet…without a necessary appetite, they are no help to us. Worse! they are repulsive. Yes? We cannot even bear the thought of eating them with a full stomach. It would cause us physical pain. Indeed. They are no good, not then.

But! O, beloved…(said with fervor)

When we are hungry! When we are starving; when we are famished…! Then, O beloved! THEN, our satisfaction is beyond repletion!

My mind…my heart…my words…lack proper articulation to disclose such things, but I’m trying; trying with desperation to help our dim-witted hearts see the benefit, the goodness, the joy in waiting. Waiting for the fullness of Love, in Time.

Love, here and now, it’s broken, beloved. It’s…flawed, inadequate, incomplete. We see little tiny glimpses of its beauty: Beauty Himself. But then…it quickly vanishes. It dissipates, I believe, so that our appetites can be roused, kindled, induced.

We, at times, think we want a snack. We, sometimes, wish to grasp after that which is within reach. We, contemplate, we ponder, we convince ourselves that our way is best. But…(sigh), O, child!

We know so very little. We need to trust Him: the one called Love, just like we trusted our mothers. He delights to give good things to those who ask!

So, ask, beloved.

Then, wait.

Wait with open arms, expectantly, cheerfully, eagerly, with the most prodigious, voracious, ravenous, appetite possible!

Are you sick with love, beloved? I know you are.

Good. Then you’re well on your way to being satisfied, some Day, in the fullness of Time.

Don’t spoil your appetite, O, child.

Wait patiently - gladly!

Rejoice, and be Glad!

Serve the Lord with gladness.

– Psalm 100:2

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Delight in divine service is a token of acceptance. Those who serve God with a sad countenance, because they do what is unpleasant to them, are not serving Him at all; they bring the form of loyalty, but the life is absent. Our God requires no slaves to grace His throne; He is the Lord of the empire of love, and would have His servants dressed in the uniform of joy. The angels of God serve Him with songs, not with groans; a murmur or a sigh would be a mutiny in their ranks. That obedience that is not voluntary is disobedience, for the Lord looks at the heart, and if He sees that we serve Him from force, and not because we love Him, He will reject our offering. Service coupled with cheerfulness is heart-service and therefore true. Take away joyful willingness from the Christian, and you have removed the test of his sincerity. Cheerfulness is the support of our strength; in the joy of the Lord are we strong. It acts as the remover of difficulties. It is to our service what oil is to the wheels of a railway carriage. Without oil the axle soon grows hot, and accidents occur; and if there be not a holy cheerfulness to oil our wheels, our spirits will be clogged with weariness. The man who is cheerful in his service of God proves that obedience is his element; he can sing,

“Make me to walk in your commands,
It’s a delightful road.”

Reader, let us put this question – do you serve the Lord with gladness? Let us show to the people of the world, who think our religion to be slavery, that it is to us a delight and a joy! Let our gladness proclaim that we serve a good Master.

Morning and Evening (January 9th - Evening), C. H. Spurgeon

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Sometimes a light surprises
The Christian while He sings:
It is the Lord, who rises
With healing in His wings:
When comforts are declining,
He grants the soul again
A season of clear shining
To cheer it after rain.

In holy contemplation
We sweetly then pursue
The theme of God’s salvation,
And find it ever new:
Set free from present sorrow,
We cheerfully can say,
E’en let the unknown morrow
Bring with it what it may.

It can bring with it nothing
But He will bear us through;
Who gives the lilies clothing
Will clothe His people too;
Beneath the spreading heavens
No creature but is fed;
And He, who feeds the ravens,
Will give His children bread.

Though vine nor fig-tree neither
Their wonted fruit shall bear;
Though all the field should wither,
Nor flocks nor herds be there;
Yet, God the same abiding,
His praise shall tune my voice;
For, while in Him confiding,
I cannot but rejoice.

– William Cowper (1779)